Lowell Deeds

The latest on real estate recordings and new technology from the Middlesex North Registry of Deeds in Lowell

November 7, 2007

Dear Mr. Gates

by @ 10:01 am. Filed under Current Events, Technology

Have you heard yet? Microsoft fired its CIO Stuart Scott for violating company policy. I don’t know what Stuart did wrong, but he just lost one sweet job…a seven figure salary and the opportunity to run a near monopoly. I love my job here at the registry of deeds, but if Microsoft founder Bill Gates called asking for my services…well, as they say in politics, I would have to keep all my options open. With this in mind I have already begun to draft my first corporate letter, just in case…

Dear Mr. Gates…
As your new CIO I think the following changes should be instituted as soon as possible at “our” company.
First: I believe “we” should change the name of the company from Mircosoft to Macrosoft.. I know, I know this is a radical proposal, but hear me out. “Micro” was OK when you were just a young Harvard dropout with an upstart software company. But now you are the richest man in the world running the largest corporation. There is nothing Micro about you or our company any more. If you like call me and we can talk about this.
Second: I don’t like the name of our new operating system. Vista? Seriously, what is a Vista? It reminds me of the credit card. Here’s my suggestion…Accardi 07. Has a nice ring doesn’t it? And speaking of ring..did I give you my phone extension number yet in case you would like to talk?
Third: Since we’ve agreed to change the company name to Macrosoft we should also move the headquarters…seriously Bill, I mean Mr. Gates, the average temperature in Seattle is 50 and sunny days are as rare as a yellow spotted thrush. I know you’re the boss but, I like a warm climate…so how about Maui or Tahiti. I hear Marlon Brando loved it there. By the way, could you forward your children’s birthdays so I can mark them in my calendar?
Of course, Mr. Gates these are only suggestions and I am new here. IF you would like to discuss these matters further I can be reached in my office in the basement or by calling my extension #0000.

Sincerely, your humble CIO
Tony Accardi
PS …In case you were wondering, my wife and I have no plans for dinner this Saturday

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